The Terrible Twos: Positive Parenting Tips on How to Survive and Thrive
Everyone has heard of the “terrible twos.” Whether you’re currently trying to navigate life with a toddler or they’ve somehow carried their tantrums over into year three, let’s face it—parenting at this age is hard. Some days can be harder than others. You might find yourself completely drained and ready for bed shortly after you put your little one down. Or, you might feel overwhelmed in the middle of the day, wondering what you’re doing wrong if your toddler won’t calm down.
Everyone goes through these struggles at certain stages. You’re not alone. More importantly, you don’t have to feel overwhelmed all the time. Positive parenting techniques can make everyday situations easier for you and your toddler. With a few easy tips, you won’t just survive the terrible twos—you’ll thrive through them.
Before you dive in, remember that our professionals are always here to help
Set Clear Limits
If your child is old enough to test your limits, it’s important that you set clear ones for them.
That doesn’t mean yelling or responding negatively when they’re in the middle of a tantrum or pushing their boundaries. Rather, setting clear limits should happen when everyone is in a calm state.
Sit down with the whole family and explain your household rules. Using age-appropriate language, you should be able to communicate to your child what they can and cannot do. Your rules should be easy to follow, and there should only be a handful of them. This will keep your child from getting overwhelmed and will allow the idea of setting boundaries to be a positive thing.
Be Fair with Expectations
Often, the “terrible twos” might seem worse than they are because of your expectations. The reality is, no child is perfect. Your little one is going to misbehave at times, and it doesn’t mean things are falling apart.
Expecting that your child will never have a tantrum or you’ll never have to discipline them will set you up for disappointment and cause a lot of frustration. There’s a fine line between fair and unrealistic expectations—you just have to figure out where that line is drawn.
One of the most effective ways for your child to understand expectations is to model them, yourself. They are always watching and paying attention (even when it doesn’t seem like it). Make positive choices with your behaviors, and they’re likely to mimic those actions.
Offer Positive Attention
Some children can act out and misbehave because they aren’t receiving enough attention. Be sure to let your little one know when they’re doing something good—not just when they’re in trouble. Corrective behavior can come through positive reinforcement. For example, if your child holds your hand when you’re crossing the street or is eating nicely, let them know how good that is!
People like to be praised for their efforts, and children are no exception. Positive reinforcement makes it more likely that they’ll repeat those actions in the future.
Take Care of Yourself
You can’t pour from an empty cup, and you’re more likely to get frustrated and lose your cool when you’re tired and burnt out. One of the best things you can do for yourself and your child is to practice self-care.
Take time out for yourself every day. Do something that relaxes you and helps to reduce your stress. Even if it’s only for a few minutes, that time of self-care can make a big difference in how you feel and how you react to your child’s rollercoaster of emotions.
The good thing about the terrible twos? They don’t last forever. However, now is an important stage of your child’s life. You can set the tone for their behavior with guidance, expectations, and effective discipline, so they will know how to control their emotions as they get older.
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